my ego is so bruised that its normal color is purple. (ba da bing. thank you, i’ll be here all week, folks.)
what? you say you didn’t know egos had a color? my dear, where have you been? but of course they do. tout le monde knows that (even megadeath does and if they do, why shouldn’t you, i ask?) if you’re ever to have any influence over others, to be a leader, one of the world’s great creators, you must stick your flag in the ground and claim it as your own. think caesar, columbus, hillary (sir edmund percival, not mrs. clinton, although she can certainly hold her own against any of the world’s largest egos, amirite?), kardashian (pick one. are you not surprised that kim is not spelled khim? i’ll wait while you digest that.)
interesting isn’t it, that i didn’t mention a single artist? i suppose i could’ve included the greek sculptor in the 4th cent. b.c. (was it polykleitos?) who made the decision to utilize contrapposto structure to their interpretation of man or maybe someone like da vinci for his truly renaissance genius, exploring as he did all disciplines, perhaps picasso, too, but it may be too soon to tell with him and what list would be complete without a nod to duchamp? none that i know of. possibly when the ‘arts’ section of the newspaper — before its extinction, of course — is the first fold and not the last, then maybe the artists will get their due.
just when i thought i’d conquered my abject need to be universally loved (circa 199_) along comes “social” media and “followers” (i.e., strangers) and suddenly it’s high school all over again with its cliques and outliers and jocks and geeks, a maze of intricate behavior (STOP! NO ENTRY!) and outrageously complicated ritual that now confounds and astounds and depresses me. depresses me because who doesn’t want the love and recognition of their peers — and not just peers, but the dream of the entire world bowing to your brilliance seems so within reach, if only the number of your followers would increase exponentially; and these, your online friends, if they would then just spread the word to all of their followers and ad infinitum, kapow! you’re a star!
and now there’s an application called ‘klout’ (the long-lost kardashian half-sister), that actually tells you how you rank as an influencer throughout your social media universe. gah! i’m doomed — as is my ego.
as a panacea i am posting a photograph of the yellow and white irises that were blooming in our garden this past week when the sun was shining and the sky was so blue you could dive into it like a pool of fresh mountain water (come on in, the water’s fine) and for the moment i cared not a whit about anything remotely related to my ego or the approval of anyone other than myself.