so. do you find it hard to say goodbye? is it easy for you to turn your back on a relationship — whether friend, lover, family and just walk away from it? does “until the next time” fail to convince either party of your sincerity? let’s call it ‘adieu syndrome’, shall we? let’s not call it goodbye (too final, save that for death or a really nasty cold). i have often wondered (just as an aside, can you believe it was jeremy brett, he of the sherlock holmes series from masterpiece theater, who sang that wonderful song in “my fair lady”—“i have often walked down this street before, but my feet…”, well can you? such a handsome man in his youth), but where were we, yes, i have often wondered what goodbye really means in today’s world. you can’t really get rid of anyone anymore what with all of the social/digital connections one makes—you’re connected in spite of your feeble attempt at saying goodbye. it seems so impermanent, more of a concept than a reality.
i said goodbye to someone i knew long ago the other day, someone who had wandered back into my life and we took up where we’d left off (if one can really do that — you know, pick up where you left off, oh say, 3_ years ago) and then you discover that you’ve been living within spitting distance of each other for several years and should you rue the time you could have had together (obviously not) and all that time had passed and then after a year of not seeing each other (it is l.a. after all and time has a tendency to collapse upon itself) and after that year goes by, they call to say “we’re leaving” and you do manage to make the effort to see each other one last time, and like any good relationship, there’s not even a bump in the road (that year behind you) and soon you find yourselves standing on a corner, shuffling your feet and it’s “oh, let’s not call it goodbye, let’s call it something else, say, farewell, we’ll see you soon (not true), until we meet again,” and a car honks at you because by then you’d stepped off the curb to get away from the goodbyes (and that tiny bit of sadness that goes with it) and they put out their hand to grab your arm and pull you back onto the sidewalk (hail mary, full of grace, even if you’re not catholic, but want to cover your bases regardless, because getting run over would have really been goodbye.)
p.s. that’s the moon tonight. goodnight moon (but not goodbye.) J67DXMBYFD35